My goal now is to be content in my own skin, to rediscover the parts of me that are still there and to figure out who I am now. It has been such a confusing time. For months I have searched and searched for something to fill the void in my life. I have applied for countless jobs, started school, started seeing a counsellor, started selling Pampered Chef, started signing up for things. I have been searching for things to occupy my mind to keep it busy so there is less time to focus on my sadness less time to be consumed with my anxiety.
It is most likely a blessing that I didn't get any of the full-time hard core corporate communications positions I applied for. I don't think I could have handled full-time work on top of everything else. Now I am working part-time, going to school, taking care of Seija, doing the books for my husband's business, selling Pampered Chef and running the household all the while attempting to answer the question, who am I now?